Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life

What Reefer Madness tried - and failed - to do for marijuana, this movie tries - and fails - to do for internet porn. Feels like it was made by and for the kind of pearl-clutchers who completely bought into Satanic Panic and call any piece of technology a Nintendo.

A young man's life is destroyed by looking at pics of women's bra straps. It's a vampire movie with the blood suckers replaced by grainy JPGs of partially-covered shoulders, right down to a brides of Dracula dream sequence where the dirty women swim around the hapless victim while exposing their ankles. It's also a sad tale of a young man whose sexually repressive mother domineers him into suicide. But mostly it's just outright fucking hilarious.

So-bad-it's-good "Lifetime" movie about the life-threatening dangers of internet porn addiction, that curiously somehow manages to never use the word masturbation. Modern made-for-TV moral panic movie akin to the 80's Satanic panic and the dangers of playing "Dungeons and Dragons," except replace the "D&D" for softcore "T&A," and the dangers that come from swords and sorcery, for the dangers of our swimmer protagonist, "Stroke Man", playing with himself.

A howlingly over-the-top cautionary tale for middle-aged housewives about a high school boy who spirals into life-destroying addiction - ruining his social life, destroying his family, and ending his athletic and scholastic pursuits - by looking at soft-core Internet pornography before bed. A Reefer Madness for a new generation. I gave it 25 instead of the 0 it earns because it's hysterical.

Oh my God this movie is downright absurd. This is one of the most conservative right-wing films I've ever seen. From Justin labeling his CDs "Virgin Vaginas" to using his girlfriend's PDA to send pornography to himself at home Cyber Seduction is an absolute "so bad it's hilarious" hoot. It's jam-packed with cliche scenes that will make any moderate experience movie-goer groan and roll their eyes almost out of their head. If you've ever wanted to see porn kill someone this is the movie to see.

A very important film. Storree of my lyf. Boys, let this be a lesson for all of you!

Ordinary teenage boy discovers pornography, notices that the girls in his school are suddenly really nice to look at for some reason, gets distracted by his unceasing horniness. So why is internet pornography the scapegoat of normal male adolescent development? It's conservative christian America where everyone is wholesome and masturbation is the activity of the mentally ill. A hilarious film sure to resonate with anyone who has a penis and internet access on just how wrongminded it is.

For anyone who ever complains about media being dominated by the left wing, this is what you get when some conservatives make a movie. It is totally crazy, nonsensical, and bizarre and plus internet porn actually ends up killing someone. If you just laughed at that, you will laugh your ass off when you see this movie. God bless you, Lifetime.

Note to self: change screen name to "Virgin Vaginas."

Monica's sexy pics are thirst traps to tease other thirst traps in 2024. God bless.

Hahahahahaha

I'd subtract about 56 points from this in a heartbeat were it not absolute unintentional hilarity.

This will make you so horny you'll start to think about fucking your mum. Watched this for the We Hate Movies podcast

How old are these kids supposed to be? I don't think the Evil Sex-Positive Girl was old enough to have a website like that. This movie was skeezy and alarmist, like the hysteria about Satanic Ritual Abuse except way more midwestern. Ironically the real villain of this movie is the kid's mother, who is so overwrought she just continually shames the kid into self-hatred and maybe suicide? I kind of zoned out when he face-palnted into the pool.

Internet porn is evil y'all!

One of those 'so bad it's good' movies for me.