Slender Man

For crying out loud it's 2018 can we stop with the body shaming. Of course Hollywood is only interested in a movie called Slender Man. When's Thicc Man coming out. Smh

I knew it was based on an internet meme; I didn't realise it was based on that old meme where you watch a stupid film for 30 seconds and then suddenly a "scary" face jumps out at you. In fairness, though, that one had a more coherent plot.

Ironically, I think that Slender Man actually literally coming after me in real life may have been a more enjoyable experience than watching this movie. I don’t even think the problem was it being an internet meme, as any concept can have good or bad execution - but the execution, well. I’d get myself in the 2020 shithouse by saying this could have been livened up by a gratuitous sex or shower scene, but the cinematography is all so fucking dark you wouldn’t have seen anything anyway.

This movie probably won't do too well. Had this came out a few years ago when the craze was more popular, it probably would have made more money. I didn't think it was scary, but it did boast some cool, creepy imagery. The dialogue in the first few scenes is atrocious, but it gets better the more it progresses. Some of the acting is good, some of it isn't. Some spooky scenes are spooky, some are not. It's not the worst movie I saw in 2018. I'm sure it will satisfy Slendy fans.

Inane horror film borders on incompetency as far as technical merits go - when jump scares don't work on this viewer, you know there is something seriously amiss! The confusing and illogical screenplay never really details the legend of the Slender Man which may have made the film more involving - overly emotive, hysterical performances by the young leads don't help.

badmovie

Wow my predicted score was a zero. I'm a staunch defender of modern horror against big brained idiots but I can't with this one. Amateur and not in the good exciting way.

Just watch Marble Hornets instead.

Critics trashed this unjustly. Decent horror very reminiscent of The Craft.

I would watch Thicc Man. Watch this if you're a middle school girl who likes to be scared.

Not the worst but quite boring horror/slasher.

Basically every scene ends with the character waking up and realizing she was having a nightmare, I was genuinely surprised when the ending wasn’t also her jolting awake from a nightmare. Absolute dogshit.

Stop trying to make creepy pasta work internet media should never collide with traditional media

Oof. This one was terrible. It's unfortunate because Joey King and the rest of the cast deserve better. I think the worst part is that this also lacks any kind of scares, so it fails as a film and as a horror. I guess working with very little results in something like this.

32.3

Watching a PG-13 aged 31 and being scared is like enjoying an R-rated comedy aged 10 and then remembering you've forgotten to take the clothes out of the washing machine on a hot summer's morning in Amsterdam.

This was a fairly mediocre run of the mill horror film filled with all the cliches that go with it. The big downside is the kind of lame "monster" and the shoddy use of bad CGI. One of the few pluses was that most of the teens in the movie actually looked like teens.

Big oof.

F

Look, I'm a big baby. Anything resembling a scare gets me. I've stopped giving horror movies credit for scaring me unless it's done in a unique way. Fleeting moments of interesting plot points or visual elements won't carry a memelord premise that's under-performed. This is not unwatchable, like they're clearly trying (to be the Blair Witch Project), and there's some meat on this bone. I guess when the alternative is "no effort", that's praise, but late goofiness only drags this down further.

I didn't think there was a worse idea for a movie than making a story based on an internet horror meme designed to cash in on a real-life tragedy. Turns out, a worse idea is to force that movie to earn a PG-13 rating at the last minute, cut anything remotely resembling scares or logic, and push it out anyway. Absolutely terrible.

After reading opinions, you'll think this movie is a disaster. Oh well, it's not so bad. More reviews here : http://movie-freak.be

The dialogues aren't really convincing, the cast isn't either. The plot... well, it could've been more convincing if anything was explained, or shown. A horror buff won't find anything interesting in this film as every little thing is recycled here.

The main problem here is that they are teenagers and I am almost forty so I have no interest in their lives. Nevertheless, the movie itself is watchable and well produced but I am looking for more mature plots.

Saw it two days ago and can hardly remember anything, might have been the whisky though.