SiREN

Drunk Bachelor Party Bro: "This party sucks." Creepy Stranger at Bar: "I know this place..." Sure, it's the premise of 9 out of 10 horror movies, but this one has a crazy hot bug-eyed flesh-eating naked monster sex slave...and it fully embraces its ridiculousness rather than try to play everything cool, and in my book, that separates it from the chaff.

An off-putting mix of old dog water mixed with campy B-movie tropes and visuals bearing very little in common with its source material. Yet, somehow, it isn't the worst thing I've ever seen?

A couple parts unironically made me laugh, but for the most part this movie is terrible. The mediocrity was deafening.

A pretty thorough thematic reversal of the original, with a lot of new nonsense of not much interest and a much more conventional narrative. Making Hannah Fierman essentially a bunny boiler more than a victim of assholes, and making the assholes more admirable protagonists, and adding a sub-EYES WIDE SHUT villain who can be threatening alongside Fierman, adds up to nothing.

watchable

Siren is The Hangover 2 with a demon instead of a ladyboy (sort of).

Looks and feels cheap.

Props to Night of the Living Podcast for its interview with Hannah Fierman that made me check this out. It's a minor film in the Species/Splice vein of sexy alien/monster horror but still worth a watch