Nine Lives

Imagine for a second how this movie would be if they cut all the talking cat stuff out of it and played it straight. It'd be about an assholish boss/dad who falls off a building and ends up in a coma, and his son gets suicidal, and his business rival engineers a hostile takeover, and his daughter becomes psychotic and starts to believe her new pet cat is actually her comatose dad trying to communicate with her. It'd be the most depressing goddamn movie ever made.

I left this on mute and just kept Spacey's Glengarry Glen Ross lines on repeat and it started to sync up like Dark Side of the Moon / Wizard of Oz.

Adults have become spoiled with all the awesome kids movies that have come out in the last twenty years. So now when one comes out with limited adult appeal and very little creativity, we balk at the idea. "Nine Lives" might be a relatively bad movie, but it's not THAT bad, though that's hardly a selling point.

The best part of this movie is that I get to choose next week's movie.

Odd body-switch comedy teeters awkwardly between "kids movie" and more mature fare; themes of alcoholism and suicide (!!!) feel like an uncomfortable fit next to the more kid-friendly hi-jinks. Still it's cute and amusing enough in an undemanding way, with Spacey, Garner and Walken bringing life to their characterisations; the cat itself (CGI and otherwise) is a very appealing hero.

With this many writers, talented actors and directors, and the fact the producers names weren't shown in the credits, I THINK this movie was a tax shelter or money laundering scheme. Suicide, alcoholism, and adultery make this movie relatable and a laugh a minute to the kids. Kevin Spacey sounds like he's holding back a yawn every time he performs. Makr Consuelos is also the bad guy for wanting to make the company go public. So yea...this movie is chalk filled with humors and plot.

I had forgotten this. Now that the memory has resurfaced, I must suffer

2016.12.1

Cheap and dumb, but cute.

F

This is an easy movie to hate, but it wasn't nearly as bad as expected. The pre cat portion (which lasted longer than I thought) had some interesting visuals. The other portion had some cheesy jokes that made me laugh.

Expectations are certainly low for Nine Lives, a crass attempt to turn the national jones for cat videos into box-office gold. But at 87 torturous, laugh-free minutes, the film could change the most avid cat fancier into a kitty hater.

Fantastically bad. Kevin Spacey in cat form ends up committing suicide from the world's new tallest building in order to come back to life in human form. Notable for NOT being the first time Christopher Walken has been a creepy shopkeeper with the ability to offer supernatural solutions (that may also contain shenanigans and eventual death) to turn the main character into a better father.

Not particularly unpleasant. But... it was a bit of an all-star cast doing nothing for no reason. Totally forgettable.

Christopher Walken as the Cat whisperer? Just felt weird and that is saying something as this review began with the words Christopher Walken. Oh well just another bad movie.

Felt off-puttingly creepy. I'm not talking about the things that was supposed to be creepy like Christopher Walken and stuff. But something about the entire atmosphere of this family movie which really did not feel right for a talking animal film. All that's irrelevant as this was pure crap and should be avoided. I have kids so I can't escape. A couple of fun cat moments cat people like, the rest awkward plastic. The worst thing... Kevin Spacey. Man, was he phoning it in on the voice overs!

hahahahhaha... Kevin Spacey WTF! :D

Granted, watching a CGI enlivened cat get drunk on 50-year-old Scotch and make a mess on a rug isn't the most creative or hold-your-side funny way to communicate that truth. But it's all part of the sweet-and-sour cinematic catnip mix of Nine Lives. (pluggedin.com)

After an accident leaves his body in a coma, a workaholic tycoon (Kevin Spacey) finds his consciousness trapped in the body of a cat, an act engineered by a mysterious pet store owner (Christopher Walken) so he can Learn What Really Matters. Inane cute-animal comedy, which settles into blandly inoffensive antics after a promisingly shoddy opening. Hardly worth seeking out, but it won't ruin your day if you get roped into seeing it. The cat trainers, at least, earned their paychecks.

Nine Lives is a children's movie that teases alcoholism, adultery, and suicide. It's a terrible mixture of The Shaggy Dog, Click, and internet cat memes. It features bored or bad actors doing the bare minimum to procure a paycheck. It has no humor. In fairness, it does have a good message, but it's one that's so overdone that its impact is very limited - and it's delivered by the aforementioned bored actors. If it wasn't for a well-trained cat, it would be without value.